Have you ever been in a situation where – despite what you think, know, or feel, you “should” be doing—you keep doing the thing that makes you nutty?

I have, and this past week I spoke with two clients in similar situations.

Both were agonizing over their next, best step and—to add insult to injury—both were beating themselves up because they didn’t think they “should” be agonizing over it.

As you can see, in both instances of “should”, above, I used quotation marks.

Why?

Because, as one of my best, wisest advisors said to me when I was in a similar situation and beating myself up,

“You’re going to do what you’re going to do until you’re done doing it.”

Now I’m sure there are those among you who read that and thought, “How glib!” or “That’s baloney,” or “What does that even mean?”

Here’s (a roundabout explanation) of what it means to me:

There is a school of thought that in Aramaic, one of the original languages of the Bible, the word sin = unripe. If you hold that concept as valid (as I do) then not doing that thing you “know” you “should” do does not mean you are doing something wrong—you aren’t ‘sinning’ in some way.

It means that that idea or action is not yet ripe for you.

If this notion resonates with you, I would remind you—the next time you begin pummeling yourself because you aren’t doing whatever it is you think you “should” be doing—that pummeling leads to bruising.

And that it might be better to sit quietly in the sunshine until the time is ripe.

If you’re still having a tough time with thinking you “should” be handling things differently, take a look at, “Wanting to Change vs. Wanting to Want to Change”