Last week I wrote about how to tell if someone in your life is keeping track or keeping score.

Why?

Because when people around you are keeping score it can feel….yuck.

This past week, I had a number of conversations with people with whom this concept resonated in a different way:

They were the ones keeping score—with themselves.

How did this show up?

One of the most frequent ways was (is) with food.

What did this sound like?

Well, if someone is keeping track it sounds like,

“No cookie for me, thanks. I had Belgian waffles for breakfast.”

If someone is keeping score it sounds like,

“No cookie for me, thanks. I was bad and had Belgian waffles for breakfast.”

You hear the difference.

The first is a math equation. The second is an indictment—of you, by you.

And, as is so often the case when scorekeeping is involved, it doesn’t leave you feeling great.

Now I recognize goals need to be “S.M.A.R.T” — and the “M” in that acronym stands for “measurable.”

However, nobody said they needed to be measurable with a side of mean.

Interested in being kinder—to yourself? Take a look at “Time to Raise Your Allowance”