These past few weeks I’ve been working with a client on his fundraising.

One consistent change I have been making has been to the last line of his request letter. In every case it concluded with,

“I look forward to hearing from you.”

“Hmmm” you may be thinking, “What’s wrong with that?”

Before I get into why I think it’s ineffective, let me show you what I replaced it with,

“I look forward to your thoughts.”

Can you hear the difference?

To me, “I look forward to hearing from you,” carries the implication that the sender will be sitting by their mailbox—virtual or P.O.—waiting for me to do something that I may or may not be inclined to do.

This sense of obligation (which your receiver didn’t signed up for) is enough to put most people off of responding in a timely manner—if at all.

“I look forward to your thoughts,” however, lands—for me– as “I value you and think your contribution will be meaningful to the outcome of this situation.”

Which is enough—I have found—to get most people to respond post-haste.

I look forward to your thoughts.