Many of us spend time thinking about how much (or little) fat we put in our mouths—but how many of us spend time considering the amount of fat we have in our lives?

What do I mean by this?

Let me begin by saying what I don’t mean: This is not an exhortation to pad your conversation/resume/social media/spreadsheet with bogus claims or figures.  Choices of this kind end poorly: they are “bad fats.”

So what are some “good fats”. Below, a few I keep in my diet:

Ask the “stupid” question: Intellectually, we know (or have been told) that the only ‘stupid’ question is the unasked question—but how many of us abide by this? I think part of the reason for this is our confusion about the distinction between ignorance and stupidity: but just because you don’t know something doesn’t mean you aren’t smart. So when in doubt, go full fat and ask away.

Have the difficult conversation: Many of us avoid difficult conversations with “I’m fine,” when we’re not. Whether you’re ‘fine’ because you’re tired, distracted or battle-weary, you’ll have a fuller-fat experience if you pinpoint what you’re thinking or feeling and state that. This doesn’t mean going 10 rounds on every conversation—none of us needs that much fat in our diet—but it does mean being accountable for your involvement, or lack thereof, when you have skin in the game.

Experience the emotion: Theodore Roosevelt’s excellent essay, “It is Not the Critic Who Counts” states, “Beware of that queer and cheap temptation to pose….as the man who has outgrown emotions and beliefs…” As you consider good fats vs. bad fats, I would ask you to hold this idea as the very best kind of fat. While it’s tempting to duck and cover with our speech (see points one and two, above), it doesn’t serve us not to acknowledge what we might be thinking or feeling to ourselves.

In fact, it’s downright unhealthy.

So go ahead, live a little.